You are not alone in hating your partner some days!


There are the times when you feel strong dislike towards your partner or start hating. If this is the condition then you are not alone in hating your partner some days. We all face such times when we dislike the people whom we love the most. And what is surprising is that many of us don’t even know it.

Vivian Zayas and Yuichi Shoda found during the studies that people do not love or hate important others, they just love and hate them. How did they carry out this research? They asked people to think of someone who is very important in their life and feel very good about them. They then asked for the feelings that they have either positive or negative towards that person. It was then reported that people have very high positive feelings and very low negative feelings towards that person.

Image result for fight between couples

Then they helped them in accessing their implicit feelings towards that significant person. Implicit feelings are those feelings that the person is not conscious or aware about. But the main question is how did they do this? They took the help of standard computer task that help in measuring how quickly people respond to their feelings. In this task, the name of the significant pop up and a target word quickly follows it either positive or negative. The person needs to categorize these words as the positive one or negative one by pushing the correct button.

What does this task help us? Let us know how our brain works. When a positive word pop up and we think something pleasant then we will quickly categorize it. But this is vice versa in the case of negative word as the process is slow. In the same manner, if we are thinking unpleasant then categorizing of positive words will be slower and negative ones will be faster.

Image result for fight couples

So this task help researchers to quantify the feelings of people towards their significant other by calculating at which speed they respond to the positive and negative feelings. So, for doing this they also need to know how people categorize these words generally when they are not thinking about that specific person. First they see nonsensical string of letters. They can now compare the responses in general way and in a specific manner.

People feel both positive and negative towards they love. The close ones invoke strong feelings on both ends of spectrum. Some days leaves us with love with our partner while the other days there may be repulsion. This is the close part of the relationship. The negative feeling does not mean that the person is wrong or you are in a wrong relationship. Repulsion also does not mean that you don’t love them.


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